For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds, casting down arguments... 2 Cor 10:4 (NKJV)
There is a commentator perched inside brains, observing life and all that comes before the eyes, and making observations and assumptions based on what they’ve seen. It’s that inner voice that likes to chatter. And this commentary, for a lot of people, tends to be negative.
For years, this voice fed me a diet of criticism, self-doubt and question… “Are you good enough? When tried, will you be able to stand? Can you really make it?” As I looked in the mirror, the voice would point out all the blemishes, the wrinkles, the bits that looked out of place, the hair that wasn’t working, the scar that was embarrassing…
It would sit with me and read or listen to sermons and offer up opinions on the subject…
This inner turmoil would not abate. No matter how much I prayed or repented (I repented for EVERYTHING – I picked my nose, I’m sorry Jesus PLEASE FORGIVE ME), the voice remained.
At the very core of the problem was my belief system around myself.
I started to write down all the things I thought were wrong with me, leaving a space beneath each one. All the things the voice offered as truth. Then I started to write down what God believed about me in the space underneath, making the choice of which voice I should listen to. And showing that inner voice what the truth really is.
I had to pray my way through this – connect with God, communicate, be open to him. Meditate and focus. I had to resist evil – pride and fear – to bring myself to such a place of vulnerability and humility that God could speak deep into my soul. Slowly, as God's words and story, washed over me, the voice began to change.
And is changing still.
Every day, every thought I have about myself needs to kneel before Christ and his love for me. And the thoughts I have about my future, others, life and healing and wholeness, need to kneel also. They are told his story, of his love for me and the world, of his plan to bring everything back into unity with himself. And day by day, moment by moment, the inner dialogue is changing. The commentator is aligning with Christ. It’s a life long, grace-filled journey. Some might call it warfare.
The greatest strongholds, arguments and things that try and exalt themselves above Christ are within us. Don’t aim at others. Let faith, hope and love do its work within YOU. Then it can work from you into those around you.
Our weapons are for a different kind of warfare. We don’t aim and fire, we look with hope, we speak with faith, we walk in love.
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